As our nation and world around us is surrounded by news of the COVID 19 epidemic, it can be very easy to neglect self-care due to the different struggles that can arise from this unique situation. It is not uncommon to experience feelings of anxiety, depression, loneliness, confusion, and even anger during this difficult time. Because of this, it is important to deal with these emotions in ways that are helpful and healing. Self- care is one way in which we can deal with difficult emotions and situations. Keep in mind that self-care is what we do (or stop doing) to take care of and improve our mental, physical and spiritual lives. Below are a few ways in which you can practice self-care during this particular situation that we are all facing as a community.
Practicing gratitude has been found to have a positive impact on how our bodies and minds feel. When we practice gratitude, this stimulates oxytocin in our brains, and this helps relax the nervous system. There are two ways in which we can practice gratitude. The first is to practice gratitude for within, that is to say, being grateful for your life, body, breath, mind, strengths, etc. The second way we can practice gratitude is outwardly by being grateful for others, our pets, nature, resources, and other elements outside of us.
Seek Social Connections
During the quarantine, it can be difficult to maintain in touch with others, however it is still important to seek out those connections for support. Having a community or a tribe of people that you can count on can help reduce the feelings of loneliness and isolation. Some ways we can keep in touch during this time is via video phone calls, writing text messages, writing letters, or social media. With any relationship, it is important to be intentional about the type of communication you have, so find ways to be creative with your communication during the time of Corona.
Stay Active
Keeping an active lifestyle can keep improve your mood and boost your energy levels. During the quarantine it can be hard to find ways to exercise, so take some time to research various at home workouts that are available on the internet. Find ways to be creative with your workouts, try new forms of exercise that perhaps you have always been interested in. Make it a social activity by including your family members or roommates. Consider making a schedule that fits your daily activities so that you are more likely to stick with it.
Lastly, if you find yourself having a hard time with the isolation and the issues that have come up as a result of the quarantine, it is highly encouraged to seek professional help. Many organizations including our own (Fuller Life Family Therapy Institute) are offering telemental health services. If talking to someone about your struggles is something you are considering, now might be a good time.
A recent study pegged the top three resolutions of 2014 to be: lose weight, get organized, and spend less. The same study shows that only 8% of people are successful in achieving their goals. One reason these resolutions do not last may be that the changes are only surface level. Merely focusing on surface issues is somewhat like cleaning only a square foot of an entire room that needs tidying. As important as those immediate goals are, why not dig a little deeper into the more long-standing rhythms of life we have been living? The fourth most common resolution is to enjoy life to the fullest, yet so many of us struggle to know how that is done. Here are some simple guidelines to create lasting resolutions that tackle our whole, beautiful existence so we are able to truly enjoy life to the fullest (Statistic Brain, 2014).
Starting Off: Where do we still live in fear?
An excellent first step is to notice the areas where we are fearful in order to target tricky areas that need our attention. For instance, we may feel fear when thinking of our finances, relationships, specific habits or body image. This first step takes reflection and a tolerance for initial discomfort. However, the insight and awareness that we can attain by listening to our fears is invaluable, and thus takes priority. Beyond this, we can begin to address the different realms of life that intertwine to make a fuller life: physical, emotional, mental and spiritual well-being.
Mental Well-Being: Never Stop Being a Student
Life never stops delivering its lessons, so we can refresh our perspective constantly by being a forever-student. We can learn from past mistakes, our relationships, or from our reflection. A wonderful guiding principle here is to always let what you learn challenge what you know. Other ideas include reading books not in your normal repertoire, attending a workshop or two that stretch your mind, or joining an academic circle that is out of your comfort zone. Have you always wondered about a particular profession or field of research? Clear a little time each week to get your feet wet, purely for the fun of it. We can even look to our relationships and challenge the status quo by making our interactions and responses more positive and encouraging. The best part is: this type of learning involves no grades!
Physical Well-Being: Balance Your Lifestyle
We have all heard it before: physical health rests on diet and exercise. In fact, we have heard it so many times, our minds are likely to tune out the message completely. However, if we can shift our perspective enough to see physical wellness more holistically – we can begin to feel freedom as we open up ourselves to more options for health. Diet and exercise are just two facets of a happy, balanced lifestyle. So don’t just exercise, engage in a fun, creative activity. Feel the joy of working muscles and a beating heart; feel the joy of each movement and breath. In addition, don’t just diet; eat lots of superfoods, and enjoy the effects it has on your body. And we do not have to stop there, we can look at how we spend our day. For one week, we can try logging how much time is spent on each activity. Chances are we might spot many areas of sedentary lifestyle plugged into our technology. Novelist Abha Dawesar asks the question: “Have our lives now become fixated on the drive to digitally connect, while we miss out on what’s real?” The frequent use of technology has powerful effects on our identity, lifestyle and overall wellbeing. The value of unplugging daily is crucial to our experience of a full life. Check out Dawesar’s whole lecture below for inspiring commentary on the role technology has in our life.
Spiritual Well-Being: Unleash Your Creative Spirit
There is more to unleashing our creative spirit than meets the eye. The process of expressing what lies within us is a validating experience that can open us up to so much life. Our initial responses to this task might be “I’m not creative” or “I’m too busy”. Each of us has an inner child and a playful spirit that needs to be expressed. A good first step is to loosen our ideas of what it means to be creative. Perhaps one person’s version of creativity involves creating a spreadsheet just for fun, while another’s involves writing a song about nonsense. Start small. Try taking a different route to work or shopping for groceries somewhere new. Build up creativity by encouraging play in your day which can further unlock your creative spirit. With regard to time, keep in mind that our busyness will never fully dissipate. Stress has a way of tricking us into feeling we need to complete everything all at once. If we can be reminded that this is an illusion, we will have greater ease in creating time for creativity. Creativity is essential to encountering the fullness of spiritual well-being.
Emotional Well-Being: “All You Need Is [Still] Love”
Marianne Williamson, celebrated author and lecturer, writes that the opposite of fear is love. “We have been brought up in a world that does not put love first, and where love is absent, fear sets in… It’s a terrible absence of what we need in order to survive” (Williamson, 2012, p. 22). We cannot underestimate the centering, transformative, purposing power of love in our daily lives. In each of our resolutions, perhaps we can include love; love for our bodies, love for our minds, love for those we share our lives with. Letting love grow into every small detail of our lives is perhaps the most paramount of steps to a fully enjoyed life. If it has been a while since we have felt love, we can start small by practicing gratitude. In all of these things, it is important to be compassionate and patient as we address these areas of our blessed lives. Try not to lose heart if results are not seen within the expected timeline. Deep, lasting change takes time and tends to be cyclical. So breathe… and take small steps daily towards truly enjoying life to the fullest. Good luck, and Happy New Year!
Williamson, M. (2012). A return to love: Reflections on the principles of a course in miracles. New York, NY: HarperOne.
NEW YEARS RESOLUTION STATISTICS – Statistic Brain. 2013 Statistic Brain Research Institute, publishing as Statistic Brain. JANUARY 1, 2014 http://www.statisticbrain.com/new-years-resolution-statistics/