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Archive for anxiety issues

Person in silence and quiet

The Science of Quiet

Posted by Shani Bell on
 May 3, 2018
  · No Comments

The Method of Madness

Imagine the days before the internet, before television, even before radio. Imagine a time when the senses were not constantly inundated with competing sources of sound and imagery. That, my friend, is quiet. Our world is bombarded with all kinds of sensory information—music, video, talking, billboards, the noise of the city, laughter, alarms. But our brains need a break from even the most enjoyable stimuli. Studies indicate that even low levels of constant noise increase stress levels and impair our ability to function properly. A growing body of research also highlights the impact that too much visual input from sources like the internet has on problems like anxiety. It also disrupts our attention and learning ability.

Experiment with Quiet

Silence, however has been found to have a greater impact on relaxation than even listening to relaxing music.  Authors, artists, and many great thinkers have used the discipline of quiet time to develop ideas. Quiet time has actually been found to improve brain circulation and help grow new brain cells. Similarly, decreasing visual “noise” contributes to greater concentration

Finding quiet might seem impossible in a society where the advancement of sales, popularity and political agendas seems hinged on how much information can be pumped into our systems. But there are tools to help give your brain a break.

  1. Plan and prioritize. Put quiet time in your schedule. Prioritize it as an appointment and do not allow others to intrude upon it. Would you brush off a doctor’s appointment to have a last-minute lunch date? Then try giving your personal time the same importance. It’s for your own good.
  2. Do it naturally. Sometimes removing yourself from your typical environment surrounded by modern technology is your best bet. Reconnect with the outdoors. Head to a park or spend a little time in the backyard. Sit and focus on one leaf or close your eyes and listen to the simple sound around you.
  3. Do it spiritually. Your quiet time is your sacred space. You can view as a time to just listen inwardly, contemplate and reconnect spiritually. Find that higher focus to help you stay in tune.
  4. Take what you can get. Locate the unused moments in your life where you could be quiet. Use your ride to and from work to disconnect from the noise. Find an unoccupied space at work and sit for 5 minutes with your eyes closed. The little moments can add up.

Healthy Results

Getting the quiet that your brain craves is more about a change in perspective. Modern society can make you feel that every free moment must be occupied with getting or disseminating information. We think we will fall behind or miss the next important thing if we do not constantly stay connected.

Sometimes we can grow so used to the noise around us that we no longer realize what we are constantly taking in. Begin by changing your mind about the importance of quiet. Then shhhhhh….

 

Contributed by  Shani Bell, MAAT, LPC-Intern

Supervised by Dr. Amy Fuller, PhD, LMFT-S, LPC-S

 

 

Categories : Anxiety & Panic, Anxiety Issues, Counseling, Lifestyle, Mental Health, Mindfulness Practice, Self-Awareness, Self-Care Practices, Sticky, Stress Management, Time Management
Tags : anxiety and panic, anxiety issues, counseling, lifestyle, mental health, mindfulness practice, self-care practices, stress management, time management

Inner Conflict: The Refining Fire

Posted by Shani Bell on
 September 13, 2016
  · No Comments

Heartburn?

People tend to think of internal conflict as torturous personal turmoil. A big decision must be made or a circumstance must be handled. You wrestle with yourself in the middle of the night and feverishly try pushing uncomfortable thoughts out of your mind all day. You view the internal conflict, itself, as the problem and you struggle against it or try to ignore it. But imagine how your experience might be different if you consciously and compassionately acknowledged the presence of differing opinions within yourself?

The healthiest way to respond to nagging discomfort of inner conflict is to face it. By facing inner conflict, you have the opportunity to gain a strengthened sense of self, better problem-solving skills, increased authenticity, more self-compassion and increased integrity. But there’s no need to gather weapons and scream your battle cry.  The conflict is not the enemy. Think of it like a puzzle that requires mindful and nonjudgmental investigation.

Or Friendly Fire…

Linda Adams, President of Gordon Training International, says that when we truly look at our inner conflict, without judgment, and commit to healthy resolution, we become more of our authentic selves and more aware of our needs.

One way to approach inner conflict is to:

  • Make a list or chart of the varying options with which you are struggling.
  • Beside each, list the reasons why you would find this option valuable
  • Then list the perceived consequences or opportunity costs for each option

Now you have externalized your inner conflict so that you can take a more objective view. As you investigate, you might notice that you are considering certain options because they are what you “should” do. From Dr. Miki Kashtan’s perspective, this implies the presence of an externally imposed value from sources like your community, friends or family. You might notice that these do not exactly mesh with values that are authentic to you. The result is the discomfort of conflict. As you mindfully consider your inner conflict, you might find other sources of discomfort such as fear, unmet needs or perceived personal limitations. Whatever needs, values and insights are discovered, allow yourself the space and compassion to honestly acknowledge them.

When you become more aware of the sources of your conflict, you gain clarity about what is important to you. Only then can you make choices from a position of self-awareness. Many times the push and pull of personal decision making comes from our view that for any one problem, there are two possible,and polar opposite choices. “I will go to work or I will call in sick and go to the game” for example. It becomes an either/or dilemma. Dr. Kashtan highlights the limitations of either/or thinking, which gives the impression that sacrifice of one need or another is always necessary to resolve inner conflict. She instead proposes devising a strategy that allows you to attend to as many needs and values as possible. By investigating your desire to go to the game, you uncover a need to fully experience and enjoy life. You also value integrity which leads to uneasiness about lying to your boss. Knowing this, is it possible to find an event that allows you to enjoy life while maintaining your integrity and going to work?

Addressing internal conflict while making life decisions can become a complex adventure. If you need help finding your way, consider contacting a mental health professional in your area.

Categories : Anxiety & Panic, Anxiety Issues, Counseling, Emotional Intelligence, Mental Health, Mindfulness Practice, Problem Solving, Self-Care Practices, Stress Management
Tags : anxiety issues, counseling, emotional intelligence, mental health, mindfulness, Problem Solving, self-care practices, stress management
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Fuller Life Family Therapy Institute
  • Home
    • Our Story
    • Our Core Values
    • Partner with Us
    • Our Training
    • Donate
  • Info
    • Our Locations
    • New Client Forms
    • Therapy Fees
    • Information for New clients
    • Secure Inquiry Form
    • Initial Session Form
    • Telemental Health Consent Form
  • Services
    • Individual Counseling
    • Couples Counseling
    • Family Counseling
    • Counseling Kids
    • Counseling with Teens
    • Speaking Engagements
  • Team
    • Harold Gibson, Student Therapist
    • Lindsay Perry, Resident Therapist, Loop
    • Stephanie Jordan, Resident Therapist, Loop
    • Chantail Green, Resident Therapist
    • Dormetra Henry, Resident Therapist
    • Riya Roney, Resident Therapist
    • Dr. Amy Fuller, Clinical Director
  • Resources
    • Houston Sliding-Scale Therapy Agencies
    • Mental Health Resources
      • Depression
      • Anxiety
    • Local Houston Resources
      • Helpful Books
      • Personal Bill of Rights
    • Healing Practices
      • Benefits of Self-Compassion
      • Self-Care Practices
      • Self-Compassion
  • Blog
    • Blog Grid
    • Resilient Relationships
    • Befriending Anxiety
    • Dancing Through Depression
    • Growing Kids and Teens
    • Healing Practices
    • Healing Trauma and Loss
    • Living Free from Addiction
    • Managing Anger and Stress
    • Sex Therapy
    • Navigating Separation, Divorce and Blended Families
    • Mindful Eating
    • Practicing Faith
  • New Year New You Challenge
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