foreplay 101

Foreplay 101: What to Know to Get the Juices Flowing

Read with caution: This blog provides sexual content and educational subject matter. Read at your discretion.

The group Mtume released an album back in the day entitled Juicy Fruit! Taste a few of the lyrics: 

“Candy rain Comin’ down, Taste you in my mind, And spread you all around; Here I am, Oh, this love’s for you…Hey, baby…Sweet as honeydew, Close my eyes…Oh, what fantasy, And you’re right here with me…Juicy….”

Foreplay is first a mindset and expectation of eroticism. The singer was able to fantasize about tasting her partner in her mind first. Hearing songs about foreplay was the only way some people learned about sexuality. 

Foreplay has been an intriguing aspect of sex for many years. Sexologist Dr. W.F. Robie wrote a book in 1924 entitled, Sex and Life: What the Experience Should Teach and What the Inexperience Should Learn. Dr. Robie’s thoughts and advice to husbands on the art of love and sex play toward their wives was expressed several hundred years earlier in a quote by Shakespeare from his poem Venus and Adonis:, 

Kiss without shame, for she desires it, your wife’s lips, tongue, neck; and, as Shakespeare says: ‘If these founts be dry, stray lower where the pleasant fountains lie’…. Kiss her nipples, arms, and abdomen. Hold tenderly and manipulate softly her breasts, and delicately when she yields nestlingly, caress her nipples.”

Now, tell me that does not get the juices flowing! Think about it! That is the point, to stimulate the mind and body to create eroticization.

What is Foreplay?

Foreplay is the erotic stimulation of the mind, body, and soul before sexual intercourse. Foreplay is not a wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am sexual encounter, quick sex without affection. Sex play enhances and provides sexual arousal, which could lead to orgasm. 

Why is Foreplay Important?

Foreplay triggers a physical and emotional response in individuals preparing both mind and body for sexual intercourse. Sexplay gets the juices flowing by increasing sexual arousal. When blood flow to the genitals increases, it causes the vagina, labia, and clitoris to swell. Better stimulation leads to more natural lubrication and an increase in vaginal elasticity. Say bye-bye to dryness because the vagina’s natural lubrication  “The Juices” increases, resulting in pleasure and less pain due to dryness.  

Foreplay levels the playing ground for both heterosexual and homosexual partners. Both men and women like to be aroused sexually either in thought and fantasy or by touching the erogenous zones. The erogenous zones are parts of the body that arouse sexual reactions when touched or stimulated, such as the breasts, thighs, back of the neck, etc. The three most hyper-sensitive parts of a woman’s body are the lips, nipples, and clitoris. The male body is very similar, with the lips, neck, and earlobes ranking top three super sensitive erogenous zones. Research shows foreplay helps females to reach orgasm along with erotic kissing and older males value extended foreplay leading to fewer sexual problems and greater sexual satisfaction. 

When Should it Start?

Foreplay can start any time before sex, hours, or days before sex. It includes all positive gestures to let your partner know that you desire them sexually. Almost everything that one does positively can be foreplay. 

How Long Should It Last?

I heard in a movie that foreplay was overrated; research says otherwise. Foreplay is more often underrated. Foreplay can last as long as the couple would like for it to last. Dr. Lindsey Doe, on her Youtube channel, Sexplanations, says the longest average foreplay is in Britain, lasting up to 22.5 minutes. 

couple in bed

Final Juicy Words

Men,  acting on this juicy information will help you out significantly. When given a choice between foreplay, and intercourse, women revealed that foreplay was the most essential part of a sexual encounter. At the same time, men felt intercourse was the most critical part. Women also stated that they wanted to spend more time in foreplay and afterplay (cuddling, hugging, and pillow talking) than men. Come on, men, give her what she wants, and your chancing of erotic sex goes up.  


Chantail Green
Chantail Green, Resident Therapist

Chantail Green, Resident Therapist

Licensed Professional Counselor Associate

Under Supervision of Amy Fuller PhD, LMFT-S, LPC-S, CST

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